Why People Hate Contemporary/Conceptual Art

[This is a recap/update on a series of articles I started over a year ago.] Lots of people hate conceptual art. It’s really quite remarkable, and possibly unfortunate. Ostensibly, artists make art to engage, entertain, and inform people, in which case hatred is an extreme response. Though it does occur to me that the kind…

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New video about Paul McCarthy’s “Tree”, with interview

I might be responsible for this!

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My former art teacher made a giant inflatable butt plug, and then it got deflated!

[Note: I wrote this and then went to dinner. When I got back the piece had already been deflated. I had to add an addendum at the bottom of the article, and update my featured image.] At first I dismissed “Tree” as just a one liner, and thought it looked like a Monopoly piece from…

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70ft Car-Juggling Robot Unintentionally Stomps on Priceless Postmodern Art!

Had Damien Hirst, Jeff Koons, or Paul McCarthy come up with this, and it were exhibited in front of an art museum, it would be the crowning achievement of their careers. It’s a 70ft robot that juggles Volkswagen Beetles. When looked at it with the eyes that view giant flower puppies, colossal turds, or mammoth…

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Worse than Hirst, a review of my art

Article from Fine Art Alert*: Billed by some as Germany’s answer to Jeff Koons, Erich Küns (who spells his name with or without the h or umlaut) has been making conceptual pieces that challenge the supremacy and legitimacy of the reigning champions of the art world. His newest piece, a 50 foot androgynous, anatomical cut-away,…

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You likely missed these epic posts, with 5 Art-Pranks, because of a technical glitch.

I wondered why people weren’t responding, or even viewing my posts of the last week. I was particularly ambitious, and made 5 new art pranks combining original Photoshop art, art criticism, and humor. All the writing, design (such a magazine layout), and the art is by me. Below are the significant posts that didn’t appear…

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Does BIGGER make better art?

Magazine cover and feature article about my sculpture, “Exhibitionist Fly”. Click on the image to see the high-rez, readable version.

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Worthless plaster mall rabbit sold as fine art sculpture for millions

The fine art crowd had been fooled again. They’ve fallen for forgeries of Abstract Expressionist paintings by a Chinese artist; paid record amounts for one-striped paintings; crowned a businessman who can’t sculpt the greatest living artist when he merely makes reproductions of the most innocuous kitsch; and now they’ve bought a cheesy mall sculpture mistaking…

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Giant Sea Monster Removed and Destroyed

“A 60 ft Sigmund the Sea Monster with male genitals washed up uninvited onto the courtyard of the Bilbao Guggenheim. Unknown artist Eric Kuns masterminded this stunt in an attempt to become an overnight art sensation, but his art-monstrosity was hastily destroyed and removed by museum authorities as litter.” Above was the tagline for a…

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Koons’s “Balloon Dog (Orange)” isn’t art, it’s a decorative lawn ornament

Everything that glitters isn’t art. Sometimes it’s just a highly polished status symbol, in the form of a fashion bauble, for the ultra rich. Jeff Koons’s “Balloon Dog (Orange)” just sold for $58,405,000 at Christie’s, on November the 12th. If you are fabulously wealthy and missed out, fear not, there are four more copies in…

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Real kitsch versus ironic kitsch

This kitsch is so good it hurts. It helps that most people assume the girl brandishing the masterpiece is also the genius behind it. We might like it less if the creator were a disheveled man in his forties who knew what he was doing, and pissed himself laughing while making it. So, let’s just…

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Artist Paul McCarthy makes an 80 ft. balloon dog.

“A one liner that didn’t need to be made, but thank God it’s not as disgusting as his usual work.” Paul McCarthy’s eagerly awaited ginormous “Balloon Dog” will soon be open to public viewing. Paaaaah! Lucky art fans will be able to see it at the New York art fair this weekend at Randall Island.…

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